Monday, 6 September 2010

No darling, your bum doesn't look big in that dress!

I'm well into my third week of caffeine-abstinence, and I have to say, it's going well. My main objective was to effect a metamorf... metermorph change for the better in my temperament, and I'm convinced, although it's early days as yet, there's definite progress as I notice I'm a little easier-going than hitherto. Not that my internal state is so different from before (and I'm of the belief, we all have similar internal states, emotionally) I'm still sensitive to many things, but the intensity is wound down a couple of turns. I confess, I was so bad at one point I'd want to fuck the offender up the arse, verbally snap at any perceived slight; but now, I kinda roll with the emotion, and I can see the practical side to this on a relational level, but... expressing oneself honestly shouldn't always be frowned upon, should it? Is self-censorship always good? It's funny though, isn't it, it's like we say, "don't tell me how it is, sugar-coat it, or better still, lie!". But... [creaking sounds of extreme cogitation] if that's how it is, even if the intentions are good, doesn't it mean we never really get to know ourselves, if we're spared the honest opinions of how others feel regarding us? Though, [more creaking] maybe most people want that, maybe they'd rather not know. It's a funny old world.


Fucking hell Gosh! And all I wanted to do was give a quick update on my abstinence progress!

5 comments:

Sari said...

Good to hear the caffeine thing is going well.

The way I see it is that the closer the person is to you, the less sugar coating is needed. I like this quote: “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” Obviously in real life things are not quite that black and white. It's tricky.

Michelle said...

Well.. as with anything else, it depends. And what kind of result you want, and who you are, and who they are, and whether this is a long term sort of thing or if it's something that's actually important or something that really doesn't fucking matter.

And of course if you need to just let steam off then that's another factor too. There are others. I haven't even begun to name them all.

Yeah.

Michelle said...

On a completely unrelated note.. the word verification has suddenly gone Italian.. or at least Italian sounding, the last one was formato, and now I have ortesera...

I'm sure it all means something.

Ronald said...

Thanks Sari, I love that quote. It expresses what I wanted to say so well. I wish I'd thought of it.

Ronald said...

Michelle. You're spot on. It's always a matter of context, and is never simple. I was just having a go at the idea that you always have to resist the truth. I mean, it's okay for salesman, but not the rest of us, surely? :-)